The Control Freak Inside Me

1001155One of the things that can drive me absolutely nuts at times is the fact that I am a certified control freak. No matter what I am doing in life there are always thoughts going stirring in my brain thinking about a better way of doing it. Even as I see others doing things these thoughts continue. It has made me what I am today, a real problems solver, a person who gets things done and also a pain in the ass. When we are working with others who are just happy with the way things are it can become somewhat of a conflict and can even take away from the whole team mentality.

On a personal scale it has allowed me have the ability to both track my own money and create budgets, control my blood sugar, and organize my life. I know where things are and where they should be placed and when I need to get somewhere I am always the first one there and always on time. But out there in the big, bad world I have learned that it is also important to try to turn my control freak off, or just simply silence it at times. The hard truth of the matter is that you really cannot control everything.

I know that I can control those things in my life that are important to me, but when it comes to things that I cannot control I really don’t like too much. This is one of the reasons why I have never taken to things like gambling or playing games of chance. Even investing money is out of my hands and my retirement plans are in the hands and fate of others who control them. I go out and drive to and from work each day and although I know that I am fully in control of my vehicle I still have to believe that others are doing the right thing. Unfortunately I know this is not the case as I see far too many getting into automobile accidents each day because they simply were either not paying attention or were distracted. What is a control freak to do though? I have created a defense mechanism where I always keep a certain distance from the car in front of me and am always alert to what other drivers are doing.

Yes, I am a total control freak, I don’t know how I got this way, but I am who I am.

Blood Sugar- 92, Weight- 174.2

Bowlfex – LEGS
Squats- 310 lbs – 15, 15
Calf Raises- 310 lbs – 15, 15

Breakfast- 2 Eggs
Lunch- Chicken Parm, Spinach
Dinner- Steak, Mushrooms, Salad

About SimpleLivingOver50

At 53 years old I am starting to realize how life changes both physically and emotionally. I strive for a life of simplicity. I am winning the battle with type II diabetes, created a plan to have all debt paid off in 4 years including the house, taking advantage of every opportunity to live life to it's fullest through adventures in nature, hiking, biking, loving and learning.
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22 Responses to The Control Freak Inside Me

  1. Raymond says:

    Are you probably dislike to take a risk on uncertain things?

  2. I am a control freak too! I am only realizing that in the last few years. In my younger years I would just use the word “dedicated” to describe myself ha! Part of my new life outlook is to work on letting go. Most of the letting go is in regard to OTHER PEOPLE. I tell myself every day that I am not in control of others and I am not RESPONSIBLE for their actions or decisions. It’s hard, but I wonder sometimes why I decided that I was the moral police?! 🙂

    It seems you are really focused and doing a wonderful job with what you have! Keep it up.

    • Yes, other people are an issue. When their priorities don’t fall in line with my own I quickly learn that I need to back away. This is especially difficult when I am interacting with another control freak that is not willing to compromise on issues and they are totally difference from what I believe. And such is life.

  3. Turning it off sometimes sounds like a good idea

  4. Bill, if I wasn’t just a couple years younger, I’d swear we were twins separated at birth. Every day you post something I feel as if you have reached in my brain and posted my thoughts. There is an “up” side to being a control freak. We get a lot of stuff done. We carry heavy burdens with ease. We expect the most from ourselves and deliver. We exhaustively help others. Reading your blog has helped me be more balanced in determining when to turn the control freak off, to get a break for my brain, like when you post about your garden, or about slowing down and relaxing. It is a process for me, and at 45, I’m just starting to discover its ok to focus on me once in a while. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us on a regular basis. They resonate with me tremendously!

  5. It can be helpful and healing to let go once in a while. Trying to be in control all the time, means you stress out a lot as well. That’s not good for your body and soul. I am in stage on of my “let go program” and it doesn’t feel as bad as I thought it would.

    • I am getting much better at it as I am learning to relax. I have total control over those relax times. LOL. Just kidding. But the truth is that by reducing the amount of stuff I own and the amount of things to do in my schedule makes it much easier to find time to take it easy and lay on my back and melt clouds.

  6. stareetika says:

    Whatever it be, control is good for the sugars! 😀

  7. A fellow control freak here too… Or data junkie as I like to put it.

  8. I am a CF somewhat to a certain extint, only because I am excellent at organization and structure…relax, as long as you don’t surcome to your own freak and become controlled by it yourself…then you are okay! 🙂

  9. I like to think I’m a very relaxed easy going person!!! To be this way I have to be a control freak!!! Eh he he

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